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Foul Rumours

from The Black Stuff by Lioness Theatre

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about

Charles becomes obsessed with fixing rubber's fatal flaw, and Charles' wife Clarissa isn't happy about his lack of work-life balance.

lyrics

Clarissa: You have another love,
She takes up all your time.
You excites you in ways that I never could
And robs us of every dime.

Charles: What foul rumours are these?
I only have eyes for Clarissa!

Clarissa: But you don't have time for Clarissa!
Or Bethan, or Stephan, or Ellen, or Lisa,
Cynthia, William, Ann, or Amelia,
Harry Petunia, RIck, or Charles Jr.
You spend all your time with another
With your mistress, Lady Rubber.

Charles: Clarissa, I'm trying to build a career.
Don't you think I would like to sit down and rest? (Rest?!)
This is the path that I've chosen my dear,
I'll stop when I've finished my quest.

Clarissa: We used to talk for hours.
You brought me wild flowers.
On an evening we'd read to the little ones.
Happy faces lit like suns.

Charles: You won't be complaining,
When we rake in the royalty payments!

Clarissa: That's just a pipe dream!
An ill-conceived money-making scheme.
We could have everything right here.
Charles: But I don't want to stagnate here.
Clarissa: What do you foresee
For our future, you and me?
Is it really the plan that our ticket to the promised land
Comes from a rubber tree?
Charles: I'm reaching the end of my tether!
Why can't we be in this together?

Clarissa: Cos you don't have time for Clarissa!
Or Bethan, or Stephan, or Ellen, or Lisa
Cynthia, William, Ann, or Amelia.
Harry, Petunia, Rick, or Charles Junior.
You spend all your time with another.
With your mistress, Lady Rubber.

Charles: Clarissa, perhaps you should talk to the Lord.
For he loves you and never would see you ignored.
This is the cross that he gave us to bear
He's not going to let us go scarce.

Clarissa: I really miss the Charles that made buttons.
Charles: The Charles content to make tuppence?
Clarissa: Tuppence is better than nuppence!
Charles: You're just like my Mom
You think I'm good for nothing.
Nothing I do will ever be good enough for you.

credits

from The Black Stuff, released July 8, 2018

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Lioness Theatre Manchester, UK

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